Social Skills and Adults with Asperger’s Disorder

June 1st, 2009 Posted in Social Skills



Asperger’s Disorder is an Autism Spectrum Disorder primarily characterized by a deficit in social interaction. The following article will detail the social skills difficulties experienced by adults with Asperger’s, followed by suggestions for psychosocial interventions.

Impairment in Social Interaction

Individuals with Asperger’s desire social interaction, but they do not know how to appropriately achieve it. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV-TR), the impairments in social interaction experienced by individuals with Asperger’s include:

  • Marked difficulty in the use of multiple nonverbal behaviors
    • Eye contact
    • Facial expression
    • Body postures and gestures to regulate social interaction
  • Failure to develop peer relationships appropriate to developmental level
  • Lack of social or emotional reciprocity

Individuals with Asperger’s also have difficulty with theory of mind issues, meaning they have trouble understanding that others have thoughts and feelings different from their own. Theory of mind can be broken into three parts:

  1. Ability to understand the intentions of others
  2. Ability to understand how their behavior affects others
  3. Ability to participate in reciprocal skills, (for example, taking turns in conversation)

Not surprisingly, the combination of a desire to be socially accepted and the inability to interpret complex and subtle social rules leads to stress and anxiety for adults with Asperger’s.

Even in domains one might think require primarily academic or cognitive skills, such as school or work, having limited social skills can be devastating. For instance, college is arguably as much about the social experiences as it is about earning a degree. Dating and romantic relationships can be especially confusing. For example, individuals with Asperger’s have trouble interpreting signs from the opposite sex, meaning it is easy for them to either be taken advantage of or mislabeled as a stalker.

At work, even a good employee can find their job in danger if they “fail coffee break.” Individuals with Asperger’s are chronically under- and un-employed, due to problems arising from lack of social understanding, such as difficulty with interviewing, failure to respect coworkers’ personal space, talking too much or too little, or inappropriate dress or personal habits.

Treatment and Intervention

The goal of treatment, or psychosocial rehabilitation, is to improve the social skills of individuals with Asperger’s. Unfortunately, scientific evaluations of the current social skills training program for adults are lacking.

Social Skills Groups

Social skills groups for adults are far rarer than social skills groups for children, but the few that have been formed have shown promise. There are several benefits to group counseling:

  • Provides an opportunity for individuals to decrease their sense of isolation and meet others who think like them
  • Ideal for replicating problematic social situations
  • Ideal for receiving behavioral feedback
  • Ideal for practicing new skills in a safe and structured environment

Some characteristics of successful social skills groups are:

  • Small group: approximately 10 participants
  • Aims and focuses including:
    • Improving self-awareness
    • Problem solving and theory of mind awareness
    • Job seeking skills (for example, interviews) and employment
  • Inclusion of a social events, attending a lunch party or a pizza outing, as an opportunity to practice skills in a real world environment
  • Long term—some successful groups run for a year, others condense sessions into two months but have monthly maintenance meetings)

The primary draw of social skills groups is that they serve both as a learning experience and an opportunity to be accepted and to alleviate the sense of loneliness felt by many individuals with Asperger’s. One program that understands this is Achieving in Higher Education with Autism and other Developmental Disabilities (AHEADD). AHEADD is a private, community organization that provides both academic and social support for students in higher education. A main component of their program is peer mentoring. This is comprised of “typical” students who volunteer their time to provide social opportunities and feedback. Mentors, AHEADD students, and AHEADD staff participate in various events around town, including dinners, bowling, pot luck and board game parties, picnics, and athletic games. Regardless of where or when it happens, participants in social skills groups often report valuing the friendships they form more than the skills they learned.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is based on the cognitive model of psychotherapy that believes psychiatric problems are caused by faulty cognitions and beliefs about the world. While Asperger’s is certainly not caused by faulty beliefs, growing up with a dramatic lack of social skills can lead to negative thoughts that are over-generalized, self-defeating behaviors, and rigidity, all of which will contribute to continued poor social skills.

There are several cognitive distortions that are common in people with Asperger’s that are potentially treatable by CBT:

  • Errors of commission (faulty thinking)
    • Interpreting situations in all or nothing terms
    • Engaging in magical thinking
    • Tending to overestimate the likelihood of desired outcomes
    • Resisting taking action to influence an outcome
    • Blaming others for events that are beyond their control
  • Errors of omission (overlooked information), for example:
    • Not noticing when others are annoyed
    • Not noticing when others are making friendly overtures

An important benefit of CBT is that it has an experiential component. Individuals with Asperger’s may learn more by doing than by talking. Role-playing and behavioral experiments will help the individual to fully understand and generalize behaviors that are learned.

Assistive Technology

Video Camera

Individuals with Asperger’s are generally highly visual people. Being shown is likely to be more effective than being told. Often used in social skills groups, video recordings of social interactions are an effective aid in a social autopsy: dissecting and examining a social situation.

Simulation Games

Software programs that simulate complex social situations are currently being researched for therapeutic potential. The Sims 2 and Second Life are two examples of simulation games in which players create characters who navigate a slew of real life activities. In these games, individuals can experience stressful social situations in a safe and familiar environment. Role-playing provides an opportunity to flush out social anxieties such as intimacy, scrutiny, and assertiveness. However, it is important that the individual with Asperger’s regularly discuss his or her progress in the game with an actual person, in order to generalize lessons learned in the game to real life.

Psycho-Education

Information about the diagnosis of Asperger’s Disorder is extremely important, and is often a part of social skills groups and cognitive behavioral therapy. Adults with Asperger’s should understand their diagnosis, what their strengths and weaknesses are, and how to advocate for themselves. Information about Asperger’s Disorder should be presented in an accurate and positive light that is sensitive to the literal way it is likely to be interpreted.

In general, social rehabilitation must be structured with an aim of providing information that can be practiced and generalized. Social skills groups, CBT, assistive technology, and education can help individuals with Asperger’s learn about social relationships and to practice behaving in a socially acceptable manner.

WRITTEN BY:

Jamie Schutte, MS, CRC
AHEADD – Communication Editor
University of Pittsburgh – Graduate Student Researcher
jamie@aheadd.org

REFERENCES

Myles, B. S., & Simpson, R. L., (2002). Asperger Syndrome: An overview of characteristics. Focus on Autism and Other Developmental Disabilities, 17 (3), 132-138.

American Psychiatric Association. (1994). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (4th ed.). Washington, DC: Author.

Jordan, R. (2005). Managing autism and Asperger’s syndrome in current educational provision. Pediatric Rehabilitation, 8 (2), 104-112.

Mawhood, L. (1999). The outcome of a supported employment scheme for high-functioning adults with autism or Asperger syndrome. Autism, 3 (3), 229-254.

Howlin, P., Alcock, J., & Burkin, C. (2005). An 8 year follow-up of a specialist supported employment service for high-ability adults with autism or Asperger syndrome. Autism, 9 (5), 533-549.

Hillier, A., Fish, T., Cloppert, P., & Beversdorf, D. Q. (2007). Outcomes of a social and vocational skills support group for adolescents and young adults on the autism spectrum. Focus on Autism and Other Developmental Disabilities, 22 (2), 107-115.

Ramsay, J. R., Brodkin, E. S., Cohen, M. R., Listerud, J., Rostain, A. L., & Ekman, E. (2005). “Better strangers”: Using the relationship in psychotherapy for adult patients with Asperger syndrome. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research, Practice, Training, 42 (4), 483-493.

Howlin, P., & Yates, P. (1999). The potential effectiveness of social skills groups for adults with autism. Autism, 3 (3), 299-307.

Beck, A. T. (1976). Cognitive therapy and the emotional disorders. New York: Meridian.

Anderson, S., & Morris, J. (2006). Cognitive behaviour therapy for people with Asperger syndrome. Behavioural and Cognitive Psychotherapy, 34, 293-303.

Attwood, T. (2003). Frameworks for behavioral interventions. Child and Adolescent Psychiatric Clinics of North America, 12, 65-86.

LoPresti, E., McCue, M., & Endres, D. (October 26, 2007). Therapeutic use of life simulation games for people with cognitive impairments. RERC on Advancing Cognitive Technologies State of the Science Conference. Westminster, CO.

Gaggioli, A., & Riva, G. (2007). A Second Life for telehealth? Proc. CyberTherapy.

  1. 59 Responses to “Social Skills and Adults with Asperger’s Disorder”

  2. By John on Jul 20, 2009

    Yea, very well said. Nice discussion going on, i will keep visiting this section to keep myself up to date. Cheers

  3. By Bob Miller on Nov 21, 2009

    My son is 21 and is a student at Pitt University. He was recently diagnosed with Aspergers. I am trying to find a support group that could help him in the Pittsburgh area. We live in the North Hills and he needs help. He feels alone and I think it would be good for him to meet others his age that are dealing with this syndrome. Please help. Thank you.

  4. By Jessica Gault on Dec 4, 2009

    I am twenty-one and am thinking of the possibility of having Asperger’s Syndrome. Just looking for some information about asperger’s syndrome

  5. By Joyce Schilling on Feb 22, 2010

    Please let me know if you have any other locations in the country. I live near Denver, Colorado. I have a daughter that is 19 years old and has Asperger Syndrome. She could greatly benefit from many of these services. Any help in starting one out west?

    Thank you,

    Joyce Schilling

  6. By Lilly Owens on Mar 1, 2010

    I have had AS or HFA for all my life. It was burtal. I have one son with this and just found out last year. I am 50 and my son is 20. We live in Orange County Cali and would like to know of any workshops or groups or anything that might help us with the social skills maybe a support group or treatment that can help. I have very good health insurance but there are no psychologist or theropist very well versed about AS or can give insight into our issues. I cannot find anything online for help with teaching us better social skills. Please help if you can. Lilly

  7. By Juliette on Mar 11, 2010

    Nice post. aheadd.org rocks.

  8. By Nina on Mar 13, 2010

    And this is why I like aheadd.org. Awesome post.

  9. By Mel on Apr 13, 2010

    I have a 14 year old daughter with something in the Autism spectrum. I echo the sentiments of Joyce looking for support in Colorado. Can anyone direct us to a practitioner/ trainer that can assist my daughter?

  10. By Linda Thomson on May 18, 2010

    Like Bob Miller, I have an 18 year old son who struggles with social interactions and managing friendships. He feels isolated and unaccepted. We also live north of Pittsburgh (Wexford area). My son will be attending the Art Institute of Pittsburgh beginning in August and I’d like him to get involved with a support group and possibly meet others with a similar diagnosis with whom he can connect.

  11. By Linda Thomson on May 18, 2010

    Jessica – I think you came to the right place. There are a lot of links on this website that can lead you to a tremendous amount of information about Asperger’s Syndrome. Poke around a little.

  12. By Judy on May 28, 2010

    Our 39 year old son, who has been accurately diagnosed with Asperger’s, has been crippled by this syndrome. He has managed to get his MBA, mainly, to be able to earn enough of an income to be able to afford to move out. He is still living with us because he is unable to move up the employment ladder. It is quite worrisome since we are retired and his future looks bleak.

    Since people with this condition are visual people (he is), are there any dvd’s available for purchase that train people with this disorder to learn to appear “normal” in social and work-related settings. We have exhausted our resources where we live and our income is very limited. Thank you.

  13. By Donna on Jul 9, 2010

    Hi!
    I have a 20 year old son with aspergers.
    I am looking for social skills groups for
    him. We live in sarver pa. (Butler county)
    Would appreciate any help. Thanks Much

  14. By Ellen Schwartz on Jul 19, 2010

    I have a 27 year old son who may or may not have mild Aspergers or ADHD. However, he has not been officially diagnosed and my insurance does not cover psychological testing for this. I first have to persaude Alan to attend a support group. Do you have any more information about your group?

    I really appreciate your assistance.

    Ellen

  15. By Administrator on Jul 22, 2010

    Dear Ellen,

    Thank you for your message. Our group is comprised of about 8 students on the autism spectrum who are currently in college. This, however, does not mean that your son cannot attend if he is not currently in college. Our group meets on Carnegie Mellon’s campus on Tuesday evenings at 6pm. We will start up again during the final week of August and continue throughout the first semester.

    We discuss issues such as emotional intelligence; employment and interviewing; non-verbal communication; effective communication skills for dealing with professors, peers, and family; making and maintaining friends; dating; and the list goes on, depending on issues our members may have interest in discussing.

    Please email admin@aheadd.org for more information, or call 1-877-AHEADD1 and I will get back to you as soon as possible.

    Heather

  16. By Rene Black on Jul 30, 2010

    I need help finding friends with Aspergers because thats what I have. I need Someone I can relate too. Like forums online for adult who have aspergers.

  17. By diane on Aug 1, 2010

    i am struggling to make friends. i was diagnosed later in life.

    i am in a supervision program that mandates 12 step meeting attendance. i can not handle those meetings. i am fresh meat for control
    freaks. forced groups are the worst for me.

    i need more to do. i help out at a church , i am friendly with the other people.

    i do okay there because i am not pressured.

    i feel awkward in groupd and get angry because i am know i am smarter than the way i act.

    sometimes my friend has to help mke with getting things done on the phone, because i seem to get no where. i guess i don’t say things right.

    i am a recovering addict also. i liked weed for social anxiety.

  18. By Administrator on Aug 3, 2010

    Thank you for your comment, Diane. When you say you “need more to do,” are you thinking in terms of jobs, or social experiences in general? Can you also talk a bit more about being fresh meat…?

  19. By Mary on Sep 1, 2010

    I have a 17 year old son with Asbergers. We caught it very early – age 2 1/2. We had him in social pragmatic skills at age 4 and group social interaction classes at age 14. We live just outside the Denver area. I have discovered that social acceptable boundaries and definitions of such are a struggle for him. What we consider common knowledge is learned behavior. He is brilliant in school, taking many AP courses but is somewhat isolated, yet puts him self out there with others even though it may be uncomfortable. He says many days, he wishes he were just like other kids for he has the recognition that he is a little different. He is a very high functioning Asbergers and will do well in life career wise however socially I too, like many of the other prior emails, am looking for a group to develop and help them recognize the cues for social integration. I am thinking of putting a group together myself alongside another professional in the field. I am a registered nurse and see “the gap” in transition from high school to college. I understand where parents with Asbergers come from – you ache for your children, and it is a difficult path.

    Mary

  20. By joan on Sep 24, 2010

    My cousin David has Aspergers. He was ten when his mom died. His father raised him and he passed away 10 years ago. He finds it difficult now to gain social skills now that he is living in a residential facility. He spends too much time at the library. I am looking for a volunteer position for him and also me in St. Louis to develop his social skills. Any ideas ? Thanks, Joan

  21. By Tammy Crace on Sep 26, 2010

    My daughter is 19 and we recently found out she has been misdiagnosed all these years with ADHD and she has mild form of autism and asperger’s. I know lately she has been having a real hard time, since she now sees she is different then her other friends and it is really bothering her and affecting her moods now. We moved to Florida 7yrs ago from New Jersey, which at that time she attended a special education school. Her teacher then told me Florida was the worse state for kids with special needs in education (boy, he wasn’t kidding) and I knew what she needed to fight for what she needs. I fought and fought but still Florida is not a great state for these needs. Florida has the FCAT and it isn’t made by need only by grades and if you don’t take you don’t go to college, where in NJ I know they have different programs that she could have went to college. Anyway, she notices all these changes with her peers and notices that she is not the same. Her behavior has become more angry as she tries to become to clingy and annoying to peers she might talk to and then pushes away. It hurts me because I can’t get through to her and everything wrong is my fault. I am trying to research and learn how I can communicate and get through to her. I am only trying to protect her and help her through this confusing time of her life. It kills me because all she wants is some friends and a boyfriend, but I know how she acts with all and she pushes away. All I want is for her to be happy and not so angry with herself and the world.

  22. By Michele on Oct 5, 2010

    I have a 20 year old daughter who has struggled her whole life with fits of rage, lack of empathy, being taken advantage of by possessive males, picked on emotionally and physically by girls, always isolating herself from others, never having one good friend and never being able to keep a friend. She is extremely intelligent but says things that make others go “ouch, Did she really just say that?”She also has always walked on her tiptoes and shakes her hands wildly when she’s excited (though she works hard to curb these behaviors now). I am convinced she has Asperger’s but know she would feel deeply criticized and hurt if I mentioned this. I don’t know how to help her but she’s drowning in this world. I need ideas in how to relate to her since she never allows me to speak more than a couple of words. She always perceives me innacurately and shuts me and the rest of the world out. She hates herself and at one point asked me if I thought she was a sociopath. She’s not though sometimes others may think she is. Help me to help her, PLEASE!

  23. By patti on Oct 20, 2010

    i have an 11 year old son with Aspergers and ADHD. i have been trying, unsuccessfully, to find social groups for him to get to know other kids and make friends in the south florida area. i would appreciate any information that anyone can give me.

  24. By Linnea on Nov 7, 2010

    I have a family friend, who is 55 years old and shows signs of a severe social disorder, however, he has never been diagnosed. His mother died 15 years ago, and recently his father passed away leaving him alone. He talks a lot about wanting a girl friend. He spends time with my family, but focuses on how he is alone and has little friends. Do you know of any social groups that are in the New Jersey area with people near his age?

  25. By James Thornton on Dec 12, 2010

    I am looking for any help for adults with aspergers in the Detroit Michigan Area. Thankyou James Thornton

  26. By lou creager on Jan 5, 2011

    I believe my husband has Aspergers. I live in the Denver, Colorada area and would like a diagnosis. I am a Critical Care R.N. and have researched this syndrome extensively.

    Recently there was a explosion of anger. I was frightened to press charges but know that I have got to seek help immediately.

  27. By Danielle on Jan 28, 2011

    For those of you seeking social skills groups, try your local Centers for Independent Living or possibly the Departments Of Rehab Services.

  28. By ellen on Feb 3, 2011

    i have a 26 year with aspergers looking for a social skills training class in middlesex county nj.

  29. By Heather on Feb 12, 2011

    Dear Ellen, Thank you for posting. You may want to look into GRASP as well as Lynda Geller’s Spectrum Center in the City. Both are comprehensive resources and, at least, should be able to point you in the right direction.

  30. By Heather on Feb 12, 2011

    Dear James,
    You are very close to an excellent resource in Ann Arbor, UMACC; they have extensive research and intervention programs for folks with Autism and Asperger’s- check out http://www.umacc.com.

  31. By Heather on Feb 12, 2011

    Dear Patti,
    I realize its been some time since your post, but wonder if you’ve found CARD at the University of Miami? They offer several groups, but may also be able to point you in the direction of other relevant resources.

  32. By adam farrell on Feb 27, 2011

    I am a college student, young, asperger adult. Do you know of any suport groups in morris or somerset county, NJ

    thank you!

  33. By John on Mar 21, 2011

    I am an Aspie that just graduated from college for the third time (got my 1st Bachelor’s after 2 Associate’s). Do you know of any support groups in the mid-Michigan area?

  34. By Heather on Mar 21, 2011

    Hey there, John,

    The University of Michigan (Ann Arbor) has a support group for adults. I hope that helps!

    Heather

  35. By Eve on Apr 5, 2011

    Hi, I am the mother of a 20 yr old high functioning Aspie daughter. She is taking a few classes 2 days a week at out local community college and is doing okay with it. She is SO stubborn though. I cannot get her off the couch the rest of the week. she just writes and draws on her computer and rarely makes an attempt at making any plans with friends (which are very few, but she has some). She wont drive. How can I get help with her in our area to get her out and get a job and the ability to GET to the job? I work full time and have to drive her everywhere. Thank you for any help you can give.

  36. By Heather on Apr 19, 2011

    Dear Eve,
    Thank you for taking the time to comment on this blog article and share information about your daughter. We would certainly like to help- can you let us know your general location so that we can recommend some resources?

  37. By janet on Apr 20, 2011

    My son is an 18 year old junior in high school I am looking for some resources for him as an adult with Asperger’s syndrome . We live in the Denver area of Colorado. He is a bright but very challenging young man. My husband and I need help with guiding him into adulthood

  38. By Joyce on May 4, 2011

    I have a nephew that I think have Asperger. He is 22 years old attend college have received his assoc. degree and have enough credits for his bacholors degree. He is trying very hard to get his engineer degree when he just had a break down which I hope he will bounce back. He really wants a social life but have a hard time talking with people and reading girls eye contact.

  39. By Joyce on May 4, 2011

    He lives in Ga. I reqlly would like to know of any groups that he can attend.

  40. By sophie Taggart on May 29, 2011

    Do you know of any support groups in the San Francisco Bay Area?
    My adult son had a head injury as an infant and the description of Asperger’s social challenges describes my son’s difficulty quite accurately.

    Thank you for your informative website.

  41. By Colleen on Jun 15, 2011

    I have a 20 year old son with AS in college in Hartford CT. He is currently in Chatham Massachusetts working for the summer and is struggling terribly with social isolation and miscommunications on the job site. He has not disclosed his AS and refuses to do so. What resources and social skills group are in these areas? Are there online support groups or blogs that are monitored and guided by professionals?

  42. By Dianne Brown on Jun 19, 2011

    How and where can I start with helping my 22 yr old son. For years he was diagnosed with LD’s, specifically Dyslexia. I recently found out from my sister-in-law that 2 of her children and there father have AS. My son has every one of the signs that point to this syndrome. My husband and I have taken care of his needs since he received his GED, he also went to a private school for special learning until we ran out of money for it, he then was homeschooled until he received his GED. I have prayed for an answer for so long. When my sister-in-law told me he should be checked with this. Since he is 22, I do not know where to start now. We live in Mesa, AZ. My husband and I have paid him and we claim him on our taxes(just found out we could do that) Can you give me any suggestions on where to start out. The thought of starting out all over again with doctors is not going to be great, but I will do anything to help him see him be able to make it in this world…

  43. By Heather on Jun 27, 2011

    Hi Colleen,

    Thank you for your posting. Have you tried reaching out to your local Autism Society of America chapter? Or Autism Speaks? They would know more about resources in your area of the country. Also, you may want to look towards the Office of Vocational Rehabilitation in Massachusetts and request a job coach to help him with the social nuances he may be missing on the job. Unfortunately, I do not know of online support groups or blogs which would be guided by professionals. That is a wonderful question, though, and a great idea. If I hear of something of that nature, I will be sure to respond again.

    Heather

  44. By Heather on Jun 27, 2011

    Hi Dianne,

    Thank you for your message. If you are looking for the AS diagnosis, you may want to check with your local Autism Society of America chapter, or Autism Speaks. Also, sometimes contacting universities in the area that may do research in Autism is helpful. It may be tough to start again, but many adults are being diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome later in life, as these individuals are intellectual capable of succeeding and often slip through the cracks. I wish you the best of luck in obtaining the testing for your son. If you have difficulty with the avenues I suggested, feel free to respond again.

    Heather

  45. By Heather on Jul 11, 2011

    GRASP has online support groups. I do not know the level of professional involvement, though. http://www.grasp.org/grasp_help.htm
    Check it out!

  46. By Robert Frick on Jul 13, 2011

    My 57-year-old brother was recently diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, and while very bright – a degree in biology – he sorely needs social skills training. He lives in State College, Pa., but I’ve been unable to find help for him through the local Penn State University. Are their any other groups or resources I should be contacting?

  47. By Heather on Jul 13, 2011

    Hi there, Robert. Have you tried reaching out to your local Autism Society of America? Or perhaps, GRASP?
    Here is a direct link to ASA options in Pennsylvania. Calling them might be helpful. http://www.autism-society.org/get-involved/state-resources/pennsylvania.html

    Best of luck!
    Heather

  48. By Heather on Jul 14, 2011

    I wanted to reach out again to see if your brother has heard of “Adult Autism Waiver” services in PA? That can help you receive counseling, and other services for free if you qualify. They typically look for people who have never received services in the past. This might be a good option. You can go the Bureau of Autism Services website.

  49. By susan CHIZNER on Jul 29, 2011

    Do you know of any social skills programs or groups in South Florida for my son, a 29 year old college graduate underemployed and fired from jobs several times due to his poor social skills I would even consider an intensive week long program out of state with a proven track record thanks

  50. By Heather on Aug 1, 2011

    Hi there, Susan.

    Please reach out to Nicole Coman (nicole@aheadd.org) who can provide you with resources in Southern FL. Best of luck!

    Heather

  51. By Leslie on Sep 11, 2011

    Hi Heather,

    My son is 18, diagnosed with high functioning Asperger’s at 14, does very well academically, but suffers from social anxiety, and is stressed about the process of applying to colleges. My husband and I are helping him with the process and have found some therapy to support him here in NJ. Where can I find colleges, for a really bright academic kid, where he could get support socially. Generally, is there a way of finding out how well students with social anxiety and mild asperger’s do at colleges far from home? He’s interested, so far, in Carnegie Mellon, Univ. of Penn., Haverford College, Rutgers Univ. honors program, Princeton Univ.and U/CAL Berkeley. He’s going to major in computer science. He lives in New Jersey. What are the best areas in the U.S. to find support for kids like our son? Thank you.

  52. By Heather on Sep 12, 2011

    Hi Leslie,
    Each college you research will provide unique support options, but all are required to provide some level of support to students who register with a documented disability at the office of disability services/student supports. To determine what level of support each school provides, you may want to anonymously call the support offices and simply ask. “Are you familiar with Asperger’s Syndrome?” “What supports are in place for students with AS?” “Are there any groups on campus which allow students to work on their social skills?” Some offices meet with students anywhere from once a semester to establish accommodations, to once a week for more individualized support. Some universities also have their own programs for students with spectrum disorders but, as far as I know, the schools you list do not. AHEADD steps in to supplement what is available on the college campus that our students choose to attend. At CMU, we have a long standing history of providing support to students. As the other colleges you listed are not located it one of our regions, we can offer remote supports via Skype, following the established AHEADD model of services including twice weekly meetings with a program manager as well as once weekly meetings with a student peer mentor. To answer your question about success away from home, generally, if students are provided opportunities to practice independence while at home, they can have more success on their own. For instance, does the student:
    1. Wake up to his own alarm?
    2. Prepare his own meals?
    3. Follow a budget?
    4. Know how to ask for help when he needs it?
    5. Understand his diagnosis and how it affects him?
    6. Do his own laundry?
    7. Keep a calendar?
    These are just a few things that students can practice (and be allowed to fail at, a time or two!) before going to college so that they feel confident in their ability to manage their daily lives, allowing more focus on academics and socialization.

    Heather

  53. By susan ott on Sep 28, 2011

    Do you know of any social skills classes/support groups in winston salem ,greensboro nc area,nAlso colleges that are open to or aware of asbergers? Please help my son social skills problems are affecting his ability to provide for his family. Continues to loose jobs. Also any recomendations for career or job sugestions. Please help!

  54. By Heather on Sep 28, 2011

    Hi Susan,
    Please check into your local Autism Speaks and Autism Society of America websites for local resources (they often have many). Unfortunately, we find that many of the adults we meet have difficulty obtaining or maintaining gainful employment due to social skills, despite having many strengths related to the tasks they are required to perform on the job. It is difficult to make a generalization of what jobs are most relevant to members of the autism community. We have met a number of engineers, historians, artists, and computer programmers, all doing very different things in different environments. One’s supervisor and work environment, regardless of the job, should be supportive, and understanding. Supervisors should establish clear and direct boundaries and expectations when employment begins. Individuals on the spectrum may also benefit from having a “point person” or understanding HR representative to address social issues and ask advice without judgment.
    Best of luck to you and your family. Please respond if you have further questions.

    Heather

  55. By janet on Sep 30, 2011

    My son is currently in grad school at U.S.F Tampa, Florida majoring in physics. What type of resources would be available to him through your org.. Please help! He needs help with social skills and making friends. He is very gifted intellectually. He has so many wonderful qualities. It has been very difficult finding resources. He was dx’d only 1year ago. He struggles with social anxiety and depression due to his isolation.I love all the different components of your group.Please help me help him!! Thank-you Janet

  56. By Charity on Oct 3, 2011

    This is the best read I have had yet, concerning social skills in adults with AS. Thanks for all you do. My million dollar question is, “How do, or is it possible to get a 25 y.o. youngster to accept the diagnosis”. He continue to claim that nothing is wrong with him and that I (his mother) had others put this label on him during his childhood. Then to make things worse, some Phychologist recently gave him the MMI2 assesment and determined he hadn’t enough cause to agree with the diagnosis. Aaargh!

  57. By Heather on Oct 7, 2011

    Dear Janet,

    Unfortunately, we do not have a location in the Tampa area, however, AHEADD does offer remote supports via Skype for individuals interested in working on academic, social, and self-advocacy skills. If you would like to learn about this program, please email admin@aheadd.org. Also, you can check with your local Autism Society of America and Autism Speaks branches for nearby resources for individuals in your son’s age group. Thank you for your message and best of luck to your son!

    Heather

  58. By Barbara Kelley on Nov 17, 2011

    Reading this entire article makes me feel that my daughter, who is now 28 years old, must have some form of higher-functioning autism. She does NOT have a problem with direct eye contact, but tends to hold the other person’s face between her hands in order to make sure that the other person is paying attention to her. She does not understand that if one person is talking that it is impolite to interrupt and start talking herself. She definitely has this problem about taking turns in conversation. I have made mention in a previous comment with a different article that I think my daughter might have a certain form of autism. She has been diagnosed by psychiatrists and psychologists with other disorders, but not autism. Would I have to specifically mention the possibility of a higher-functioning autism to the psychiatrist or psychologist before they could begin proper diagnoses? Or is there some other doctor that should perform these diagnoses?

    Sincerely,
    Barbara Kelley

  59. By Heather on Nov 21, 2011

    Dear Barbara,

    A psychiatrist would be appropriate to give the autism diagnosis, but it is up to you where you would like to look. You could visit therapists of many backgrounds to receive a diagnosis, including psychologists, social workers, counselors, etc. You can certainly mention your thoughts about HFA when you go. Even if they do not provide a diagnosis of Autism, it may be beneficial to find out the differences between your daughter’s diagnosis and autism, simply as a means of learning more about her needs.

    Best of luck.
    Heather

  60. By Michael on Dec 24, 2011

    I’m a 52 year old male who was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome 15 years ago in 1994 while being hospitalized for a bout with depression.
    One of the doctors who evaluated me informed me that he thought I seemed to present a classic case of Asperger’s Syndrome. When I asked what it was he told me it was a type of autism. At that time my only knowledge of autism was a child who would not talk and spent most of their time screaming and banging their heads. My reaction was to be insulted and dismissive of his opinion.
    A few years back a friend mentioned that his son had AS and I remembered what I had been told back in 1994 so I became curious and used the web to gain a little knowledge about it. It was like reading a biography of myself !
    Since then I have come to accept my condition and try and cope as best I can without much success. It has interfered with many relationships and employment positions.
    Recently it has caused me some legal trouble and my attorney feels it would be helpful to me if my medical records could be retrieved to use in my defense. However, it seems as though the hospital does not keep such records forever and says they no longer have them.
    I have inquired with a psychologist about being evaluated again and have been told that the testing would cost about $6400.00 for about 16 hours of time at $400.00 an hour !
    In 2008 – 2009 I lost both my business and my home and spent almost two years unemployed. I am now working again but have no health insurance and cannot afford to drop that amount of money at this time and I make too much an hour to qualify for any assistance even though I am still in a dire financial position.
    I’m hoping someone can help me by letting me know if there is a way I can get evaluated again that won’t put me back living in an RV.
    I’m in the northwest part of North Dakota and could really use some advice.

    Thanks for listening ! Hope you can help.

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